The Road Game Journal feature will detail our excursions to various Miami Hurricanes road games over the years. Hide the children, because when you wear orange and green to an opposing team’s stadium, well, they tend to not take to it kindly. The below article details our trip to Tallahasee to see the Canes take on the Noles in 2009.
Miami 38, FSU 34 (2009, Tallahassee): Another trip down I-75 to Tallahassee. I headed down with my buddy Jake the Jew (who is a die hard Seminoles fan) and was going to meet up with my buddy Khalil and his brother Omar (aka ‘Omes’), who are Canes fans. I really like Doak Campbell. Mainly cuz we always seem to win there. Fresh off a 7-6 season, the ’09 Canes weren’t being given too much chance to win more than one of their first four games (FSU, GT, VT, Okl). The Seminoles were favored and though I am the eternal pessimist, I had a feeling that the Canes would mature a bit and do well.
We get down to Tallahassee early, drop our bags off at the hotel, and head into town to grab some eats. I forget the name of the pizza joint we went to, but I do remember that a single slice of pizza was the size of Bryant McKinnie‘s ass. I was hoping that it didn’t taste like it as well. Food was good and our waitress had one of the top 10 bodies I’ve seen in my life. She would have been top 5 if not for the ink on her ankle. So after some drinks and pizza, we head on over to Doak as the sun is starting to set. We park in a parking deck near the UM tailgate section. As usual, the F-Bombs are flying at us from every angle seeing that most of us are wearing the orange and green. As we’re leaving the parking deck, a beat up Camaro-looking thing full of FSU students drives by. One hillbilly lookin’ dude is leanin out the passenger seat with a can of beer. Nice. Didn’t catch the brand, but I’m guessing Nattie Light. Anyways, they start with the “F**k Miami!! F**k the Hurricanes!!” rant and then all of a sudden – BAM!! A loud crashing sound. The driver must not have been paying attention to the road because shortly before exiting the parking deck, his right front headlight smashed into the back of a parked car. Immediately, the other passengers start yelling, “Just go dude, just go!!” F’er peels out of there without leaving a note or his insurance info. F’n Seminoles. We didn’t catch the license plate (neither did the clueless parking attendant), but if you own a burgundy Cadillac that got its right rear taillight smashed out at the Miami-FSU game last Labor Day, I’m guessing you are not going to be compensated. What sucks is that the Cadillac was parked in a f’n handicap spot. Brutal. The only consolation in the matter is that he was probably a Seminole fan too. (I mean, what Canes fan is going to drive a burgundy car to Doak Campbell for a game, right?) So, after a couple attempts to right the situation (which we were never able to do), we head down to Doak Shambles.
Ahhhhh, the start of college football season. Labor Day…national television…there is no other place I’d rather be (well, aside from the Orange Bowl…oh sweet Orange Bowl, why did they tear you down…hold on, I gotta get some Kleenex). OK, I’m back. So, Omes’ entire diet that day consisted of some beer and a friggin calzone. That mixture was doing a number on his insides. As we waded through the sea of rednecks and made our way into the stadium, it was clear that he wouldn’t make it to our seats. So he bolts for the restroom (Doak is almost my home away from home so I let him know where there was a little known restroom on the ground level) and we head over to our seats. There’s something about the first game of the season, regardless of your team’s outlook. Everyone is undefeated and everyone has a similar shot at the prize. Game kicks off and Omes is still in the sh*tter. Couple minutes in, Travis Benjamin burns the FSU secondary and runs under Jacory’s lob pass for a score. We’re goin’ ape-sh*t. Jake is stone faced. There’s nothing like scoring a TD in a visiting team’s stadium. You can hear your cheers echo in the silent majority. I’m nervous, but deep down, I’m thinking Mark Whipple‘s the man and we’re gonna run away with it. Not so fast. Game goes back and forth. FSU takes the lead, Miami takes the lead. Omar shows up for a few minutes, then heads back to the sh*tter for Round 2. With Miami down 23-14, it’s not looking good. I’m sent back to my first game at Doak, the Kenny Kelly-led Canes loss in 1999. Ugh. Omar literally has taken 6 sh*ts and we aren’t even into the fourth quarter yet. That has to be some sort of stadium record. To the sanitation workers at Doak Campbell, I sincerely apologize on his behalf.
Then Jacory gets knocked the f**k out and I see true freshman AJ Highsmith warming up. What the f**k?! We are TOAST. Jacory comes back (he would later say that it was a funny bone incident and he couldn’t feel some of his fingers…kind of like Colt McCoy in the Rose Bowl, only Jacory sacked up and stuck it out…hahaa…I keed, I keed). After Graig Cooper ties it up, I start to feel light headed. And, I ain’t about to head to the concession stands to get some water and miss game action. I, like Jacory, tough it out. Seriously, I’ve never played college ball, but if I’m light headed and dehydrated from sittin in the stands, what must it be like to actually play in the game? So, FSU kicks the go ahead field goal (f’er couldn’t miss it wide right?) and Jacory drives the length of the field. He hits Benjamin for one of the most beautiful passes I’ve ever seen. Second read, into double coverage, hits him in stride. Finally, we have a quarterback. When Coop scores on 1st and goal from 3 yards out with 1:53 left, I yell “Noooo!! There’s too much time on the clock!!” Coach Shannon HAS to learn better clock management. Bowden was the worst. He literally could have won 2 or 3 of those missed FG games by simply having better clock management. I would have liked Miami to take a knee on first and then have three shots to score. FSU had one timeout left and leaving 1:53 on the clock and a timeout is an ETERNITY in a game like this. Teams were goin back and forth alll night. You could tell early on that this was a game that would come down to who had the ball last.
To make matters worse, we botch the kickoff and FSU starts off at our 49. F**k. As expected, Christian Ponder scrambles and FSU drives down to the red zone. Now, our seats are about 30 rows from the field at the Miami 10 yard line. This is all about to crumble right in front of me. I can barely watch. I look over and Khalil literally has his head between his knees. “C’mon dude, this is not the time for one of your auto felatio attempts,” I yell. Turns out he was so wracked with nervousness, he simply couldn’t bare to watch. 3rd and 3 from the 5 with 17 seconds left…Ponder drops back…throws incomplete…ok, 4th dow…what? A flag?! F**K!! I’m getting flashbacks to Tempe 6 years ago. 1st and goal from the 2…FSU down by 4…14 seconds left on the clock. I am about to sh*t my pants and am 95% sure we’re going to lose this game. I swear, next Miami-FSU game, I am wearing some Depends. 1st down…incomplete. 9 seconds remain. Brings up 2nd down and goal. Ponder drops back….incomplete again. Phew! One more chance. One play…the game literally comes down to one play. Shame someone has to lose. Man, such torture. 5 seconds left and my heart is racing faster than a bunny rabbit running uphill. Ponder takes the snap….rolls out…my balls recede into my body cavity…I see Jarmon Forston separate and yell out, “Ugh, he’s open!!”…Ponder flings it…an open Forston drops to his knees to cradle the pass and I can’t tell whether he caught it or not…I see the ball come loose then look to the refs for confirmation and they signal incomplete. Me and my buddies go wild and the rest of the FSU section we’re in is silent. Man, it just doesn’t get any better than that.
