Road Game Journal: Miami 35, Georgia Tech 10 (2010, Atlanta)

The Road Game Journal feature will detail our excursions to various Miami Hurricanes road games over the years.  Hide the children, because when you wear orange and green to an opposing team’s stadium, well, they tend to not take to it kindly.   The below article details our trip to Atlanta to see the Canes take on the Yellow Jackets in 2010.

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As an Atlanta resident, I am the beneficiary of the Canes playing literally a few blocks away from my home once every two years.  For nearly a year, I was looking forward to November 13th.  Not only would the Hurricanes be coming to town for what should be an ultra-important divisional game, but it is also the same night as the Manny Pacquiao-Antonio Margarito fight (oh, and it’s my fiance’s birthday too, but enough talk about her).  I made sure to buy tickets as soon as they went on sale.  $134 for two end zone tickets.  Little did I know that it would be a battle of back up quarterbacks in a virtually meaningless ACC game.

 

Regardless, I was still looking forward to seeing Stephen Morris in action.  Still a Jacory supporter (we’re a dying breed with each passing week), I was curious to see how the true freshman would fare against Al Groh’s defensive schemes.  I wake up in the morning and realize I’m going to have limited time with my fiance on her birthday, so I made sure to be on my best behavior.  Made her breakfast and gave her a birthday present – a pair of PINK Victoria’s Secret……Miami Hurricanes sweatpants, and a PINK Hurricanes t-shirt and long sleeved Canes sleeper.  Woo!!  She really liked it (really) and I was pleased to get it for her (well, except for the fact that the sweatpants cost 64 f’n dollars.  For f’n sweatpants?!  Wha?!  I could’ve gone to Wal Mart and painted an orange and green U on their $4 sweatpants). 

 

My buddy Jason, who went to Tech and is a big Yellow Jackets fan, heads over later in the morning to go to the game with me.  Bobby Dodd stadium is literally 1/4 mile from my house – I can see the stands from my balcony.  I bust out my new Canes shirt (retired the old one after the FSU debacle as I am now convinced that shirt is cursed).  We make the short walk over and see tons of Canes fans.  As we approach the stadium, we see the obligatory Jesus freak, huggin his Bible and shouting nonsense about how we’re all going to hell for ‘eternal repentance.’  WTF?  Dude, don’t these people have anything better to do with their time?  Besides, I’m not goin to hell for seeing a college football game.  I’m goin to hell for what I’m going to be doing at the Cheetah after the game.  They should really be protesting there.

 

We walk in the stadium shortly before the noon kickoff and I notice something.  It’s quiet.  The atmosphere was deader than the dad from ‘Happy Days’ (too soon?).  Seriously, I have never been to a college football game where the atmosphere was lazier and quieter (well, maybe the 2000 Miami-Temple game I went to in Philly).  Noon start…both teams with 3+ losses…both starting quarterbacks injured.  Not exactly a recipe for an electric atmosphere.  In the entire journey through the sea of Tech fans, not once - not ONCE – did anyone hurl an F bomb or a ‘Miami Sucks!’ at me.  This was a first.  I felt so naked attending a road game without an F bomb hurled at me.  You could tell that neither fan base cared too much about the outcome. 

 

We head to our seats about half way up in the North End Zone and notice all these middle aged dudes wearing navy blue Georgia Tech jerseys in our section.  Turns out Tech was honoring its 1990 National Championship team and they were having a reunion that day.  The team was in our section, all be it 20 rows higher than us.  First off, can’t they get these guys better seats?  These f’ers won a national title, and you stick them half way up in the end zone?  Secondly, I notice that I see a lot of grey hairs and pot bellies (numbers being stretched across their jerseys).  Jeezuss.  This is only 1990.  All these guys look like they can’t even tie their own shoes any more.  The only dude who looked presentable was kicker Scott Sisson (ironically, the only guy I remember from that team), so I snapped a paparazzi pic of him near the concession stands.  I’m planning on selling it to TMZ this week for $25K, so please don’t copy and paste – it’s copyrighted.

 

Speakin of stretched out shirts, I would like to take a minute to make a plea to the Obama Administration.  Please, please, please….pass a law that makes it illegal for anyone with a body mass index over 30 to wear Under Armour shirts.  Seriously.  There is no reason for me to know the exact size and shape of your man breasts Mr. Yellow Jackets fan.  I tried to look away, but before I could do so, I could see the actual outline of this guy’s nipple.  And, this dude made Phil Mickelson look flat chested.  I think I saw some hairs poking out of the shirt material as well.  Ugh.  That is an image that I will never be able to erase from my mind, unfortunately.

 

Games starts and hoooooly sh-t, the Canes play flawless football.  I swear, it’s the play calling (and the offensive line gelling) that is the difference.  THIS was the team every one was expecting at the beginning of the year.  Despite all the key losses after this year (Bailey, Bosher, Hankerson and probably Brandon Harris), the Maryland and Georgia Tech games give me hope for 2011.  Miami is rolling and I am puzzled at the lack of false start penalties we’re committing.  My friend Jason keeps telling me that Tech sucks and I can’t really argue with him.  Miami is up 14-3 at the half.

 

I start headin to the restroom at half time and reach into my pocket and instantly realize that I forgot a piece of Halloween candy in my pocket.  Must’ve put it in my pocket before I left the house.  It was a Hershey’s Dark Chocolate mini.  Now, I had been sitting in the 70 degree sun for almost two hours.  I pull my hand out and it looks like it is covered in diarrhea.  F-ck!!  Not only that, but my digital camera is partially covered in melted chocolate.  Great.  So I head to the bathroom and go to the sink with my right hand half covered in melted chocolate.  It literally looks like I ran out of toilet paper in the stall a minute ago.  Then I get my camera – also covered – and now it looks like I ran out of toilet paper and tried to wipe my ass with my digital camera.  I turn to the guy next to me and say, ‘It’s chocolate.  Really.’  He says nothing and nods his head as if to say, ‘Yeah, right buddy’ and then takes off. 

 

Once that is squared away, I return to the game and Miami rolls in impressive fashion.  I am amazed at how disciplined this typically undisciplined team is playing.  Good stuff.  We head out with a few minutes left and now I must go root for the Tar Heels to upset Virginia Tech.  Of course, f’n UNC lets me down.  I get ready to head out later that night.  Me and the fiance head to some fancy restaurant and I almost bust out in hives when I see the prices on the menu.  24 dollars for an oyster appetizer?  And get this, you get 4.  $6.00 per oyster?  What’re they, in gold and diamond encrusted shells?  Anyway, a couple of her friends join up at the bar later.  I grab a drink and notice that it is almost 11.  Gotta run…fight night.  If there is anything I like as much as Hurricane football, it is the fighting pride of the Philippines, Manny Pacquiao. 

 

I walk a few blocks to the local sports bar by myself to meet my friend Troy who’s there with a couple friends.  Bar is packed and overflowing and they’re not letting anyone in.  So, I’m stranded outside with 35 of my closest friends and we watch the fight on the outside TVs.  Just as it’s about to start, about 8-10 cop cars roll in, sirens blaring, and then a fire truck.  They storm the sports bar in SWAT like fashion.  10 cop cars?  Really?  Is that necessary?  Who is holed up in this sports bar, Osama Bin Laden?  Is he curled up in a urinal stall under the Steve Bartkowski poster?  Turns out it was just some drunk dude who pulled a knife on someone.  They carted him off and he had blood on his face and was yelling ‘F-ck you!’ continuously to no one in particular.  Manny destroys Margarito to complete my great day.  Dolphins win on Sunday and my fantasy win on Monday round out the perfect weekend (for those that don’t know, when the Canes and Phins lose on the same weekend and I lose in fantasy, it is known as a Black Sunday).  I know some out there are rooting for this team to lose to expedite Randy’s firing, but I just can’t bring myself to do it.  I’d rather see them win out, finish in the top 15 or top 10, and put together a season in 2011 that they should have put together in 2010.